It’s ok to be scared but leap. God’s got you. In this past week, I had to choose whether to leap in faith or let my toxic pride cloud the help I needed.
I knew what I wanted to do but it was just terrifying. I asked God for one thing and He gave me something different. He likes to do that.
I am a cautious person so I don’t like surprises nor uncertainty about what is next. I am a type A planner, control freak through and through. But, that’s not faith. It’s fear. Fear is quite the monster. Fear is a thief of life itself. You can either give into it or fight with faith. Toxic pride creates a control freak mentality over everything and I get so frustrated when things are different than my plans. My anxiety goes through the roof and the past mistakes creep up. I am on edge. Fear cripples and eats me alive.
Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.-Hebrews 11:1
Faith in action is hard. It’s not a noun but a verb. It’s a daily exercise and practice. Faith is going into the unknown but it is also knowing that God is ever-present leading and guiding you. He knows you (and I) are scared but He’s a Comforter and Sustainer. He will not let you fall no matter how many times you (and I) think otherwise. Breathe. Inhale and Exhale. It’s scary but God’s got you. He will never leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6).
So I just wanted to share that. It’s ok to be scared. We are human. Every day is a battle. But just know God is with you even in the unknown places and decisions we need to make. Leap in faith. When God puts faith inside of you, all things are possible. With that comes surrender to self and pride. Fear does not allow you leap, faith does. Trusting God takes faith not fear only. Living takes faith not fear.
Something God has taught me is there is purpose in the waiting. When God calls you to wait, it is not like a waiting room at a doctor’s office where you fiddle your thumbs till your name is called. No, God is preparing you for the next moment or season of life.
I say this because I am in a long season of waiting. Initially, I thought waiting was pointless like a waiting room. I just existed and tried to live. But life is more than pleasing myself. Through time and some growth, I realized the true meaning of “the wait.”
One thing I know about God is that He does not work idly, thinking as He goes. He creates moments of preparation for the next thing. God created the universe in seven days. Could He have just snapped His finger and make everything come into existence? Yes. But He chose to take His time to create and fashion everything.
God would bring different people to my path and for whatever reason had a need. Whether it was a church friend, family, friends, or stranger, their presence served a purpose. Whether it was meeting a simple need or using my skills to serve another, God had a purpose for it. God did not let my skills and talents go to waste. I was and continue to be in preparation. My biggest cheerleader, my mom will encourage me to act or volun-tell me to act and tell me to remember there is blessing in my obedience. AHA! Blessing in obedience. That’s not to say that you serve to get something in return every time BUT God honors our obedience. We act on His Will and Plan, not in our own power.
And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up.-Galatians 6:9
Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!-Psalm 37:6-7
Waiting is hard. Believe me, this season has gone longer than I thought but I am learning that God has the Master Plan. My dear friend said to me, “HOW you wait is what is important.” Complaining and anxious thoughts do not help me wait. It hinders the lesson of the wait. Each day is a struggle but God makes a way out as long as I am willing to obey. So I serve in whatever capacity God reveals and I make the best of each moment in each day. Yes, I have to remain still and know God will work it out. Yes, sometimes my anxiety gets the best of me. But I am never too far away for the Holy Spirit to get me back on track.
For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.-Jeremiah 29:11
Ultimately, the waiting will result in a prosperous future whether it be financial wealth, spiritual growth, character, and other various ways. But this I know: God upholds the outcome but also uphold me and you in waiting.
We can all be our worst critic…I am preaching to the choir on this. A deep realization of growth is learning to preach truth to myself and be still. For me, it is staying in God’s Word, the real truth that speaks life.
But, I’m not gonna lie…sometimes I read Scripture and there is no spark or burning bush revelation. Yes, the Bible is God-breathed and active (2 Timothy 3:16). But God’s instruction may cause different responses. Yes, I get conviction and truth but lately, I have been still in His truth and put a verse(s) in my Christian tool box.
He says, “Be still, and know that I am God;-Psalm 46:10a
I have been learning to take in scripture and really marinate on a specific truth in my life. I just need to be still. My mind just races constantly about the future. Will life fall into place with my career, with friendships, with a romantic relationship, marriage, children, etc? I almost give myself headaches and anxiety just thinking about an unknown future.
But I am learning to be still. Easier said than done. I remind myself not to worry for what will it add to my life?(Matthew 6:27). Absolutely nothing. The Enemy is trying me but I feel greater is coming…that’s why he is working so hard.
A passage that causes me to be still and preach to myself is: being confident of this, that he who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.-Philippians 1:6
I am choosing to be still and preach currently: God completes what He starts. So God is not done with me and the things that worry me will be completed in Jesus’ name and timing.
What do you need to be still and preach truth to yourself about?
New Life Alert: I found a job and have been working since December. YAY!!
A true blessing in the mist of the pandemic. The story is quite amazing and only God could have orchestrated the events.
Let’s go back 8 years. Fresh college graduate with dreams of being an attorney. Where to start..I did not know.
My proud mom of a new graduate was telling her boss about my aspirations. Her boss said “I have a cousin who’s a lawyer. Let me call him.” Let’s call him Lawyer X. I got Lawyer X’s contact and emailed him. My mom’s boss said “He’ll be expecting you.” I emailed him, interviewed with him, and I became his intern.
It was a great experience. Being a lawyer is not like the television shows. It takes hard work and preparation to give adequate representation for a client. He was a quiet man but wise, really smart, and a Christian. I learned the best professional lessons of life from him.
Though it was only for the summer, we still kept in touch over the years. Always great encouragement and sage wisdom whenever we talked and emailed one another.
Let’s fast forward to November 2020 (I know..bad memories but bear with me). I was still looking for a job which was already hard as it was. I contacted Lawyer X and just asked, “If anywhere is hiring, please let me know.” He said he would be on the lookout. In mid-November, he emails me that there is a job opening: part-time and a lot of work but it will give me good experience.
I applied. I got an interview. I got the job. YAY!! (Mom gave me the biggest mama hug. She’d been praying really hard for me.)
I get there. I am getting acclimated to my new position. I talked how I was referred to this job by Lawyer X. My supervisor said, “Oh Judge X, we love him.”
HOLD UP, WAIT A MINUTE!!! I did a “That’s So Raven” vision vortex space out (90’s-00s Disney Channel reference) and remembered a few years back Lawyer X said he was a Judge at one of the local courts, part-time.
***Leaving vision vortex. Back to reality***
I totally forgot and did not remember which court Lawyer X (now Judge X) was at. Could Lawyer/Judge B have told my supervisor about me!?! Maybe… I did not know. When Judge X came to court for his hearings, we would talk some and get to our work. He never mentioned if he had anything to do it. But, I knew Judge X would never tell me if he had a hand in me getting hired.
About a month ago, I was doing some work for my supervisor. She complimented how I have been a big help and she is so glad Judge X told her about me. AHA! He did have something to do with it. My supervisor said how she was asking Judge X if he knew anyone who needed a job who was organized and a hard worker. Well not to toot my own horn, but I did a darn good job as a summer intern. She was hoping that I applied…she even said she waited for my application.
WOW! An internship from 8 years ago got me the job I have now.
I know this is a long story but here is the purpose. My parents have always said ” A strong work ethic will bring you far in life.” It does and it did.
Yes, God worked in His providence to get me my job but also, my work ethic was my calling card and my resume. Showing your best work and skills will work out in your favor. It may not be immediate…it may take years but don’t fail to work hard in whatever you do.
Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for human masters, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.- Colossians 3:23-24
Whatever it is you are doing at a job, volunteering, serving your community, or a summer internship, DO IT WELL.
No matter how big or small your job is, your best work can lead to a bigger blessing.
I received rejection letters from countless employers. I was almost used to the rejection but God’s plan was bigger. My past experience led me to my job. My humble internship was not in vain. Lawyer/Judge X took notice and remembered and God made him remember me.
So it’s not luck that I got my job, it was evidence of God’s mighty hand through my work ethic as a former intern that got me where I am. I am truly in awe of how amazing all of this came together. But, I guess God makes things happen that way…and He’s not done yet.
2020 was quite a year. The whole world went upside down, inside out, up, down, and through the trenches of life. It is easy to feel defeated and down. Believe me, I felt that way. Plans were changed, cancelled, postponed, and TBD. Everything I wanted did not always come to fruition. God just said, “Not Yet.”
I heard a message that put things in perspective and hit me.
God will not fail you, forsake you, nor forsake us.
WOW! That struck a nerve. Though life has beaten me, us, and our world, God allows me to keep moving. I am still alive. I still have provision even in the mist of uncertainty. I still have little victories while waiting for breakthroughs and big moments.
Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”-Deuteronomy 31:6
I just want to encourage you all. God knows your pain and insecurities and He’s still got you. He is not letting you go. It may look bleak and concerning but God has not forgotten you. He is still sustaining you even in the tiniest things..things that we will never know on this Earth.
I have to remember always that God hears and sees me. All things are meant to mold and change us, whether good or bad. But God is still God. God is still Supreme. He knows all things. He sees all things. He works through all things.
For the Lord takes delight in his people; he crowns the humble with victory.-Psalm 149:4
I can attest that God has not steered me wrong, not ONCE. God has given us VICTORY. We win because He won. The battle is hard and there will be losses. But it will get better because God makes things better. I believe that for myself and you all.
God will not leave you worse than before. He is still with you. May you feel the love, comfort, and security of Him in your life today, tomorrow, and far beyond 2021.
I know it has been a long while since I last posted (i.e. March). The pandemic was intensifying and toilet paper was flying off the shelf (weird? I believe so). I thought that things would eventually pass but boy was I wrong.
At the start of the quarantine lockdown, I thought I would be at my peak in creativity. I thought that I would be a creative machine. A pandemic was not going to stop my optimism.
Well I was wrong. I got weary, restless, bored, and lost interest in things. Looking back (while still in the pandemic), I felt drained. I dealt with a lot of setbacks and disappointments during the quarantine. I felt empty and depressed. The anxiety of the pandemic and the rise of racial tensions made me feel hopeless at times. The weight of seclusion and helplessness came heavily and I shut down hoping that I would have the energy and the will to write and be creative again.
Blissful Lesson: You can’t pour out what you don’t have.
I allowed myself time to come together. To rest. To recharge. To just feel better. So I stopped writing. I had to find joy and contentment again. I was not blissfully me so who was I to tell people to be positive. So, seven months later, I feel better. And I desired to write again to you.
I want my writing to be organic, not forced, from a place of authenticity and love for you all. So it was not intentional but something I needed to do.
I’m back. I have missed you. A lot has happened. The world is uncertain and going crazy right…am I right?
But in the mist of the chaos, I wanted to come back with the medicine of encouragement and Jesus Christ.
In recent weeks, the Coronavirus has been running its course causing social cancellations, social distancing, self quarantine, new cases each day, and uncertainty in the economy and life as we know it.
God has ways of getting our attention. We can see that clearly. He can strip all the excess and distractions until we are at the end of ourselves. Where we are at the end of our ourselves, God steps in.
God never lets anything happen without a purpose and reason. No season of life is without a lesson.
Trust. Yes, trust.
God is stripping away the physical securities for us to draw closer to Him. It’s like a back to basics. Trust God in every part of your life: your health, your family, your physical body, and your decisions. The things of this world is temporary. It is really clear.
The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.-Psalm 9:9-10
It is important to value and be a good steward of the blessings in front of us. Slow down. Take a look around. Value what God has given you. Maybe the lockdown and self-quarantine is the wakeup call. Stop looking at the temporary and look to the eternal: God.
The future is uncertain but God is a certain, constant force to keep living in this day in age. Trust in God. He provides all things and works in all situations. His provision is real and certain.
It’s ok to be scared. We are human. We have emotions but it is important not to stay there. Trust in the God who will comfort and provide in many ways.
When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.-Psalm 56:3
Take care of yourself and your loved ones. Trust in God’s unchanging power and provision. God’s got us and will see us through
Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.-Philippians 4:8
Christmas is finished. Now, the year is winding down. We are less than five days from 2020. We are closing the decade of the 2010’s. I think it is easy to look to the new year but don’t forget to look back. Remember the good memories and triumphs of 2019. Remember how far you have come this decade. I know God has grown me from a second semester freshman to a law school graduate. I know God has shaped my character to make me resilient and tough. There are good things to praise God for. No matter how small the triumph, celebrate.
In this season of giving, do not forget to give. Christmas can get commercialized and lose its meaning in the hustle and bustle of Christmas excitement. Something I like to do is give Christmas cards. Yeah I know…I receive Christmas cards all the time, you say. Yes, but I hand-write my cards with a specialized message. AND I love giving the cards in person if I can. You can never go wrong with giving someone a handwritten card. The look on a person’s face always makes me giddy. This is just one example. It is the simple things you can do for someone that makes Christmas and every day special.
I thank my God every time I remember you.-Philippians 1:3
This post is for expressing my love and gratitude for you all reading. I just wanted to thank you all, My Blissfully Bianca Family (aka Bliss Fam) for your comments, likes, viewings, and sharing.
I thank my God for giving me this platform to share and spread the Word of Jesus Christ while expressing the freedom of blissfully being who God made you to be. You give me such life and joy.
Writing has given me therapy to let out things I am feeling. When I was younger, I wrote in journals and diaries to express my feelings. I have a problem of holding in my emotions and pain but there is relief in knowing that I am not alone. By writing, I found an outlet.
I am always surprised when my words impact people around the world and people take my words in. I enjoy what I do because of your love and support. I just wanted to let you all know that.
Hugs from Yours Truly. Happy Thanksgiving Everyone!