God has been teaching so much in this current season of life. A big thing I have been working through is speaking kindness, grace, and truth to myself.
I am my own worst critic. I can speak kinder to a stranger than my own soul. When my plans don’t go as planned or I deal with setbacks, I just fall in despair and allow the Enemy to speak lies. My anxiety is heightened and I get into this headspace of hopelessness. I am blessed to have people in my life to encourage me, to lead me to Christ, and to pray for me. Though I am glad I have them, they should be the last people I go to.
Sometimes I feel God is so silent, it’s almost like I am all alone (but that’s the Enemy). In all actuality, I’m not alone; I am just not still. That is a problem: It’s hard to be still when your mind is running 500 miles an hour.
I had a moment of anxiety last week and my family and friends said “Do not worry about the unknown. God has a plan.” I have struggled with when this current season will shift. I am in a season of waiting and it’s hard. It just weighed heavily last week.
And I was reminded of these verses:
Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.-Philippians 4:6-7
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.-Jeremiah 29:11
So I am working on being kinder to myself. Give myself credit on how far I have come while waiting for the next step. Easier said than done but I am trying to take charge of my mental health and being. Knowing God’s Word helps fight the thoughts that can run me ragged. Doing my quiet time and being present in the moment. Interacting with fellow believers to keep me accountable. And stop and breath.
A mantra I say some times is “daily bread.” I am referring to the Lord’s Prayer passage, “give us this day our daily bread.” I repeat it because it reminds me to be present now. I can focus what God has put in front of me and that’s all. That is what I need: daily bread from the One who gives it freely.
This revelation is not based on luck but on self-care and personal discernment for better. It is my form of self-care. Self-care is not just the physical things one does. I love to shop, get my nails done, have brunch, paint, etc. etc. But self-care is also the emotional and mental ways you care for your mind.
Like all of you, I am a work in progress. I am flawed but loved by a perfect Savior. I don’t reach perfection in this life. I have to keep bearing fruit allowing God to prune and grow me. So this is my growth and my self-care journey.